10 Things
by Flyintofu
Summary: Exactly what it says on the tin: 10 things that Gokudera hates about Yamamoto.


**Summary: Exactly what it says on the tin. Gokudera lists what he hates about Yamamoto.**

10 Things I Hate About Yamamoto Takeshi

_I know the original assignment was "List 10 Things You Like About A Friend", but do you think I care? Just read the essay and be glad that I'm actually doing the work, bitch._

His Hair

_It spikes up everywhere! It's irritating, and I have no idea why he can't just comb it all down. It's like...I can't even run my fingers through without getting pricked!_

_Not that I actually run my fingers through his hair._

His Skin

_How does a fellow get his skinned that goddamned tanned? Okay, I get that he plays baseball and goes out in the sun and blah blah blah, but he's as brown as a cookie! Does he have a sickness that makes his skin that tone or what? Not that I'm concerned - I'm NOT concerned about anyone except Juudaime. _

His Baseball Obsession

_Come on, I can't be the only one, right? I hate that he's so freaking obsessed over baseball that he can't even spend any time away from that baseball bat. Yeah, so he's dedicated to the sword too. But it doesn't make the fact that he can't spend any time with me - ahem, everybody else - because he's in the batting cages so often any less irritating._

His Strength

_I hate that he hit me a while ago, over some nonsense about me driving everyone away and not being a good right hand man. And I hate that I actually listened and helped him fight some guy away after that. I mean, Juudaime himself said that I was his right hand man! Well, that was after he told me to stop being so closed up, but still. He hit me damn frigging hard, and that's annoying. That baseball idiot doesn't know his own strength._

His Laugh

_Because seriously, that laugh makes be want to hurl myself in front of a car. It may or may not be related to the fact that the laugh is usually accompanied by some ignorant - as - heck comment that Juudaime can do without. _

_(It may or may not also have to do with the fact that whenever he laughs, he sounds like a child. And that just deepens my crush on him.)_

His Talent

_He's just so goddamned carefree all the time that everybody likes him. And he's so close to Juudaime too. I'm supposed to be Juudaime's right hand man, not him! I'm the one who trains and trains and works and he just laughs and Juudaime likes him already. _

_I'm not jealous. It just pisses me off that he doesn't need to try and yet can be a hitman, whereas I need to use my brains. He's better than this guy, that they call the sword master, and I can't defeat the knife asshole. Of course, you won't know what I'm talking about, you're just supposed to mark my essay. Che. _

His Personality

_Oh my god. His personality. I don't think there's even enough room on this piece of paper to list what I hate about his personality. _

_Okay. He's nice to everyone, kind of funny, cheerful (except for once when he was really depressed when he accidentally made this really bad mistake that made Juudaime lose a match), and talented. And he's able to make even me like him way more than I should. But don't tell him I said that, or my dynamite will meet your staffroom. _

His Looks

_Earlier on, I mentioned that he was too tanned? And that just serves to make me frustrated because damn, he's hot. And the tan makes him hotter. Not that I'm gay or anything - or maybe I am - or whatever. Why am I even explaining to you, a teacher? You're just supposed to give me the marks. _

_But his features look like they're chiseled onto his face. By a very good sculptor. Che, whatever. _

His Attitude

_Get this: he thinks that everything is just a game. Are you kidding me? 7 people (okay, 6 people and one machine with a person inside) comes to Namimori and almost kills us and themselves and you think it's just a game? He's mad! Who can mistake that murderous intent? And what's more, he became friends with that freaking shark that he fought! I mean, who becomes friends with their enemies? I'm even unable to stand some people on my side! Like that snotty stupid cow, that perverted pineapple freak, that tonfa bastard, turf top, my sister, that girl from Midori High who apparently is not good enough for Juudaime, that clumsy Cavallone guy, pervert doctor who now preys on girls in this school, Irie Shoichi, who almost killed us all, the whole of the independent assassination group, and I haven't even gotten halfway through yet! Of course, I don't expect you to know these people, except for the freaking tonfa wielding head prefect, turf top, and the pervert doctor. Just because I'm kind enough to protect the people in the school that Juudaime is studying in, try to avoid the doctor. He's a real sicko._

10. His Attraction

_With all his faults, he still can attract people. Gah, scratch everything above! His hair is spikey but it's so soft, his skin is amazing, his baseball obsession is cute, his strength is enough to stun people who don't know him, his laugh is so incredibly childish that it's freaking adorable, we're all lucky that we have him and his talent around, his personality is so patient that he can actually make me like him, his looks make me want to swoon, and his thinking that everything is just a game makes it fun for him, and protects his mind from anxiety, unlike me. I'm anxious, I'm too smart for my own good, I have experienced not having a home before, I know way too much about life, and I'm in love with Yamamoto Takeshi. Screw everything else. _

_And once again, you better not tell anyone else, or forget the staffroom, I'll blow down your house as well! Che, just give me the marks and forget about this essay!_

_Essay written by: Gokudera Hayato_

_Class: 2A_

_Teacher's Comments:_

_Never knew you had it in you to write an essay with such passion in it! Great job on the essay, and twisting facts so that you can write it!_

_A+_

**A. N. My little attempt at some 8059! I'm considering doing one for Yamamoto, listing what he likes about Gokudera. Should I?**

**Thanks for reading, and kindly leave a review on your way out!**

**- Flyintofu**


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